Whirligig 4

4 Whirl

I chip the ink from your diaphanous shade,
dissonant and weather-beaten your words
roll from my purse unlacing themselves
like stains on patches of mottled velour.

I clip your iridescent smile to my heart
let it cancel out all vacuous tendencies,
the explicit and unsubstantiated doubts,
the clamor of the faultfinding masses.

Not related to the poem which isn’t really complete. I received some very upsetting, shocking, troubling news recently. My mom who suffers from Bipolar was convinced by a friend to stop taking her medication (I believe she stopped cold turkey). She fell into a deep Depression lost her job and ran away from home to live with another man (not my stepdad) in another state. My stepdad is 86 and has Congestive Heart Failure (his issues are physical not mental so no dementia or anything). She has decided to return home but cannot do so because she does not have the money to make the trip at present (my stepdad doesn’t have any money either because she has not been managing the finances properly). We haven’t been in much contact the last few weeks and I am still trying to process everything that has happened. From the sounds of it her friends and family have totally shut her out except for me and my stepdad (she said he was willing to work things out). I can’t even imagine how broken hearted both of them must feel right now =(.

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23 responses to “Whirligig 4

  1. I am so sorry and heavy-hearted about your mom. That is terrifying.

    As for the poem, I do think it’s complete. I very much like this length.

    This is my favorite:

    “dissonant and weather-beaten your words roll from my purse unlacing themselves like stains”

  2. Your Mom’s experience is so sad on many levels. Friends, and often family, do not understand the severity of Bi-Polar, and sometimes can make it worse by trying to help–meddling, really. The worst is that these people who should be supportive and understanding end up turning their back on them or abandoning them in their need.

    I am not Bi-Polar, although there is a strong strain of the disorder in my family…back generations even before it had a name.

    • Bipolar runs in my family as well. Had you asked a few years ago I would have thought myself Bipolar but since I started taking birth control for Amenorrhea my moods have really stabilized. My therapist thinks my issues are more from PTSD dissociation trauma and doesn’t believe I have Bipolar but she did meet me after the birth control! I am really devastated about the whole thing. Her friends gave her the advice, what did they expect would happen? And then to abandon her =(

      • Friends are fickle, and family sometimes worse, unfortunately. These people that “don’t believe” in Bipolar or other mental problems just don’t get it even when it happens in their own families. I feel for your stepfather, who has his own health problems. .

  3. This is so sad really. And upsetting. It never makes much sense when people interfere – meddle is such a good word – as offered by Gradmama – because when signs start showing, that something isn’t right, that the person is struggling or “slipping” – instead of trying to be supportive and actually knowing what’s necessary – well to suggest no meds? And if your mom actually went cold turkey and then, well, all of this? Oh how difficult. For both your mom and step-dad – and yeah, it’s hurtful when suddenly, everyone who you thought was a friend etc. suddenly doesn’t want to know you from a hole in the ground.

    I hope that everything works out for both of them – and that your mom is able to recover and get back on track, and feel better.

    • Thank you so much Pat for your kinds words and concern. I just don’t understand people giving medical advice when they are unqualified especially to someone in such a vulnerable psychological state. Then to abandon her like that when she really needs support.

  4. I love, “I clip your iridescent smile to my heart”—so lovely. Very sorry to hear about your mom 😦 Sending hugs for you and hope for whatever they most need in this situation.

  5. Also, is Whirligig 4 meant to be a prompt that other people write to and link up to? I assumed it was because the words were displayed so beautifully like a wordle and so I wrote something to them but I can’t seem to find a link. If you could clarify for me, Yves, that would be great. Thanks 🙂

    • http://sundayswhirligig.blogspot.se/

      That’s the link to the site that hosts the wordle. The site is run by Magical Mystical Teacher I just discovered it myself. I am going back and working through the old Wordles but they are closed so you can no longer link up to the old ones but there are new ones too! We can share with each other if you also want to do the old ones 😄

      • Oh, haha, that’s funny….I thought it was a new thing you were doing or that MLMM had going on and that I just couldn’t find the link-up…But, I love Magical Mystical Teacher and have done some of them, but YES! I would love to go back and do the old ones with you 🙂 How do you want to do it?

      • We could link to each other somehow? I could add a link to your poem in my post and vice versa. I am not sure about the timing though or we could drop the link in each other’s comments? Lots of people link Wordles to me. My email address is kesaiserris@gmail.com

  6. Hope you, your mother and step dad come out of this okay. Wonder what your mums friend was thinking by advocating that she stop her medications. Without knowing the situation all I can imagine is someone who has it in for ‘big pharma’ talking about stuff they don’t really understand.

  7. Hope it works our for your mom and for every trouble there is always answers. Hold on to your side of things and don’t get lost in her’s. and your poems are always written in such way that they never end for the interpretation of your words goes on forever.

  8. I wish you and family the best. What you are going through is crazy but human. It is hard to think of what maybe happening around everyone’s actions. Good luck. Sometimes no answer is all there is.

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