No

Whirlwind

Leonora Carrington

Who could relieve my biology

These spiteful yearnings?

A victim of design

Rather than election

These imperfect suits

Of flesh do not

Accommodate the mind

And the heart

Has no where left

To go but through.

 

Could you spare me

The humiliation

Of reduction?

My eyes fumble

On the tides

Of incursion

Your staggered smile

Breaks wind

Could it be

That you speak

More than necessary?

Cruel in emphasis

A simple no would stand

*

I tried to write a poem but my nerves are absolutely shot I have an important test to take today yikes!

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19 responses to “No

    • Thank you Alan! I can’t say it was a piece of cake I got in class C the levels are A B C D (D being the highest placement) I am going back to school to learn Swedish. I live in Sweden now and have for a while but I have social phobia and rarely interact with others. I am better at writing in Swedish than speaking, I am just so incredibly shy that even approaching someone and speaking English I am shaking and positively incoherent so doing that in another language well it hasn’t worked well

  1. i hope your test goes well today….

    you did well considering the circumstance…and wonder if that test is not eating at you…maybe you wont even have to worry about a no and it will be a yes…smiles

    • I think it was eating at me Brian

      I have taken it and gotten my placement. I am going back to try studying Swedish again because of my social phobia they want to create a small class of 4 to 5 people for me rather than put me in a class 30 students. It is unusual for someone to be able to write before they can speak which is my situation because my nerves cripple me. If they are able to arrange this it is an amazing opportunity they’d been giving to help me learn. When I move I will have to travel 50 minutes there and 50 minutes home that part will be a pain in the ass lol

  2. Love. The suit of flesh, the talking too much, the eyes fumbling! The expectation of “no.” when everything seems to say “yes.” It has been too long since I have been here.

  3. Hope you did well on your test. We can only do our best.
    I would love to be fluent in another language.
    When my grandparents were living they chose to keep their native language to themselves. English was what was used unless they wanted to speak ‘privately’.

    Breath, relax and I hope you get to enjoy the learning.

    • I have a really hard time of it to tell you the truth, learning languages. I did okay I suppose but considering how long I’ve been here. I wish I had learned Cherokee from my grandmother, we gardened together but she didn’t speak very much in general and so I never learned much about her. I know she grew up on a reservation and I know she was a contortionist (and was offered a position in a circus but she didn’t take it)

      • Somethings that our families kept from us might have changed who we became. It think though in the long run they only hoped the better for us, especially when their own experiences or secrets weren’t part of the main stream.

      • They really might have. I don’t think in her case she was secretive and had I been older I might have asked her more questions about her life. I was young and so I tried to bond with her through plants because that’s what she loved. My other grandmother made up all sorts of versions of her past some fact, some fiction all intricately tangled

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