Brooke Shaden
1
Innocence can neither
Be claimed nor extinguished
The older I get the younger
Everybody else seems
And we are all just scraping by
No matter how it appears
In our experience of envy.
Every war ever fought
Starts within a heart
So wounded that it cannot
Comprehend its own means
2
I think I might be
Beautiful after all
Because I have never met
In another man a mirror that
Could encompass me entirely
3
I don’t remember
Much after birth
It’s as if I’d died
Right there, unfinished
Wearing nothing but a shriek
And life is nothing but
A protracted declaration
Of all that we mean
But never achieve
4
Hesitation is the subtlest of poisons
Its occasional necessity makes
It especially hard to distinguish
I have imbibed more than most
And in every window there are
Two hand prints emblazoned
Like leaves suspended in
A perpetual state of Autumn
5
Your smile siphons speech
Perhaps I’ve always been mute
A shaft of lightening
Portentous and labyrinthine
Perhaps I’ve stood here
Intermittent as an exhale
Staring into the immensity
Of your salacious curvature
As lifetimes flit by unseen
6
I should have torn my sleeves
Left them folded on the duvet
Like a pair of decompressed wings
Anything to prevent the transmission
Of my ailing heart into your likeness
7
I hate the way you
Turn my tears into artillery
And if I am nothing
But a circuitous means
To an unsatisfactory end
What’s the point of pulling
The trigger?
8
Sometimes I follow
The flight of swallows
Thinking that if angels
Existed they’d also appear
Ordinary when dismissed
9
Every time I close my eyes
I see the blush of the universe
Undressing and everything
I need to know can be found there
In those bloody silhouettes
10
Who determines excess?
I’d rather my emotions be
Heightened than abridged.
There’s always someone
To edit my silences
No matter how gratuitous
The endeavor there’s always
Someone, palms twitching,
Waiting to refer my pain
To the next unsolicited suitor
And justifications always refrain
11
I have always been afraid
Of expectations knowing
That they are only ever
Defined when unmet
*
I saw this 10 poems in 20 minutes and thought what a great challenge “hint hint” I thought I’d give it a go I didn’t bother numbering them as I was typing and apparently I lost count. This was hard but fun. I didn’t have time to think or quibble with myself over vocabulary so it is all pretty much stream of conscious.
Inspiration for this challenge can be found here
Update
If you’ll recall from my last update the upstairs bathroom is one of our primary concerns (financially speaking it has in no way discouraged us from going through with the sale) and I’ve just received an update on the situation from Sam.
The insurance company suspects that the leak may be occurring underneath the floorboards, a misaligned drain pipe or some such thing. They are planning on drilling a hole in the living room ceiling to investigate. If the problem is easily rectified they will fix it which will allow Sam and I more time to save up for the remodel. If they find that the problem is serious they will have no choice but to redo the whole bathroom.
Now the insurance company doesn’t care about aesthetics so if they redo the bathroom they will likely keep the old bathroom suite and replace the walls and floors using the cheapest available options. The home owner’s daughter figured we might not want that so she said we can buy whatever we like and the insurance company will use that instead. So we wouldn’t be doing the renovations at all just picking the decor. Since the insurance company will be paying for quite a bit that does make renovating the bathroom cheaper in the long run (not to mention neither one of us has ever actually redone a bathroom) and since we would be paying for whatever decor replacements we want the sellers have offered to lower the price of the house. We knew we’d have to redo the bathroom so it makes sense to do it this way but on the other hand remodeling a bathroom is not cheap. We were planning on saving up a little first but we’ve decided to take the offer and hope for the best! I don’t know at this stage though if the bathroom will even require an immediate remodel but it doesn’t that should give us a little more time.
The Realtor is working on the contract now with the stipulation that the bathroom still needs to be repaired by the seller.
mindlovemisery 