In my eyes you always ascend
A moon amongst stars heavily crossed
A poem with a lamentable end
*
On ritual we came to depend
The value of labor, to comfort lost
In my eyes you always ascend
*
For peace we often pretend
How invasive this winter frost
A poem with a lamentable end
*
Let us not secrets but intimacy defend
For love, sanity is a meager cost
In my eyes you always ascend
*
In aspersion we invariably descend
Temperaments on tempest tossed
A poem with a lamentable end
*
If only an apology could mend
But hearts do not burn on exhaust
A poem with a lamentable end
*
First I want to give credit to my inspiration for attempting a Villanelle. My poem might not be a true Villanelle as I always miss something when tackling an unpracticed form.
http://reowr.wordpress.com/2013/09/18/nothing-left-a-villanelle-and-challenge/
I thought it might help if I had a little structure and I think it did because I was so absorbed writing the poem and working out the form that I was able to let go of my stress. I have a few forms I use haiku, tanka and what not but I tend to avoid rhyming forms not that I dislike them just that my brain doesn’t really work that way. They are a challenge. I love Villanelle though (check the link and you will see the form in its true glory) and I think it is important to challenge yourself. I don’t think I ever do justice to the forms.
mindlovemisery 
Brilliant! Villanelle’s are hard…you’ve captured the from very well and made it artistic too, bravo! 🙂
That should say captured the form, not the from, LOL! 🙂
You don’t think I captured the froms? 😛 Thank you so much Helen I do find the rhyming forms a challenge
Well those pesky froms are very hard to catch I find, LOL!!! 🙂
LOL!
‘For love, sanity is a meagre cost’ what a wonder expression and a thought as to the power of love. Beautiful.
Awww thank you =) That makes me so happy!
You captured the form wonderfully, as well as the froms and everything in between. This is an absolutely beautiful villanelle and automatically denounces your claim that rhythm is not one of your strengths. I would love to put it on the challenge post with your permission.
Thank you Sonya I am so glad you liked it! And you can post it on your challenge it would be an honor =)
I used your pen name if that’s alright, unless you would like a different name instead. It is such an awesome name!
I was so happy when I saw you’d used my pen name =)
This was a brilliant vilanelle! I loved the repeating lines you picked and how you constructed everything around them to deliver a very powerfull, indepth, heartstring poem.
Thank you so much for your kind words!
This is beautiful! ❤
Thank you Jashael =)
Oh with your wonderful way with words, you can do justice to any form or writing style. 🙂 Such a rare and beautiful talent you have. 🙂
Thank you Anja =)
Very welcome 🙂
Using specific forms can free us for other things. Lovely poem.
Thanks so much =)
this is brilliant
Thank you Celestine =)
It’s excellent as always. But in my opinion, M, maybe it’s just me, but I don’t really enjoy when you write in some traditional form (I hate all poetic forms except haiku lol). It feels like watching a show, while reading a poem should be like a heart to heart conversation. I just think that your wonderful way with words shouldn’t be limited by forms, unless it’s a form you yourself create 🙂
Awww thank you I don’t plan to convert and write only in form I do it occasionally for the challenge.I feel that substance is lost with strict forms in some cases, with my own work at least but I want to overcome that someday/somehow. Don’t worry though most of my work will be free verse with the occasional haiku (I love haiku). I much much prefer free verse it just feels right for me =)
Thanks for teaching me about the Villanelle style of poetry. It is lovely as is your post.
Awww thank you =)
You are quite welcome!