Softened by a whimsical palate and sealed

In vacancy there was a time when shadows

Slipped from that carnivorous aperture, from

The hostile shock of pomegranate within, so

Unlike the soft pastels without. You, father,

With your reptilian eyes have disguised yourself

Well within its darkness, within those closet-dwelling

Fiends in which I came so tenaciously to believe


Supernatural, psychological, nightmares

For which I swore you could not be blamed

But I have seen you raven-cloaked in the dead

Of night, cancerous silhouette, dislocating from

The walls to slink invertebrate into my bedroom


It was self-preservation that led me to fashion

Monsters on your behalf, better my own madness

Than a sickness capable of unmaking the world


I am reading this book that deals with childhood trauma so I find myself writing a bit more darkly

Submission for Magpie Tales

The Mag


34 thoughts on “Making Monsters

  1. def heavy…i worked with abused children and its a surreal world at times….so much pain…and sadly oft entwined with the parents…i wont say they take the blame always or even intentionally at times…but its a messy messy thing…

    1. I wrote Mother over at Carbon which is more on the abuse them. I was one of those children he believed everyone was good but myself, I am still like that I always look inside for whats wrong,, for the source even things completely out of my control. I must think I am supernatural with all the stuff I attribute to myself. My husband was actually the one to help me see it wasn’t my fault what my dad did

  2. Sometimes when you open the door, a fresh breeze will dust away the cobwebs. When it does, I pick them up put them and burn them in a ritual so they cannot return to haunt me. This is a fearsome, but also fearless work. I like the way you empower yourself with your own brand of madness!

    1. I am reading this autobiography and this woman has all this repressed trauma that she has to dig through and I realize as much as I do recall there are obvious blocks. I do not know if I am ready or not to know what’s behind them. A part of me things that knowing might air everything out but I can’t afford to go through a stage of lower functioning so I am not really sure what to do. As I blame myself for everything its more a fear of finding out something gruesome about myself than about someone else

  3. A sad reality for too many. Your second stanza is riveting! Thanks for sharing. You offer hope to so many going through the same thing.

  4. ‘It was self-preservation that led me to fashion monsters on your behalf’ … As soon as I read that line, I felt my heart jerk and immediate kindred with you. I know that pain. I have lived it, too. Your poem is amazing. Thank you.

  5. It was self-preservation that led me to fashion
    Monsters on your behalf, better my own madness
    Than a sickness capable of unmaking the world

    Oh MLM – such darkness behind closed doors here, trust and childhood marred – so many hugs you might burst sent your way!

    Anna :o]

  6. I have found the Mag to be a safe and supportive venue to express any thoughts and opinions that need a voice. I think the power of the words you have written here are equal to the loudness that ‘Charleston Farmhouse Door’ (prompt) unlocking would make in a silent hallway. So expressive…. I am sending warm wishes your way. Thank you for sharing this.

  7. What goes beyond locked doors so often remains hidden until the psychological scars remind us of the reality. As a teacher I worked with chlldren who were forced to make their own monsters. Powerfully written.

  8. Self-preservation that let me to fashion monsters on your behalf…powerful stuff…and struck a chord with me…

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